This is great seeing people it's really helping me think through my brain

So i've been chatting it up with a bunch of people state side. They have asked me about random stuff that I hadn't really thought about on the plane. It's really been great and I can't wait see you all. my mom wanted everyone to know that i have had a great time seeing her and being home. Love ya ma.

But I think one of the biggest break through today was talking to one person and then talking with the big man up stairs. It just so happens that one of the books I read was talking about the importance of prayer. yada yada he said you should carve out 5 minutes every day. no more, no less, just make sure you do it every day and at the same time same place. So I set my time today and it just so happened that "we" had a good chat.

I asked him why I felt so close to him in mexico and why I felt so close to him in many other big adventures in my life. So when tried doing argentina, Why did it feel different? There were many times in the that trip where I kinda felt "fafa" alone. I know I wasn't alone he was deffinately with me the whole time and actually with me for eternity. So as I was having a this conversation out loud in my bed room. I realized that times when I feel close to God are when I persue him with a passion. Maybe I'm on a mission trip or life is really hard and I had to rely on him or than ever. But in those times when I take a big adventure it's much easier to persue and feel him. When you go state side you can pursue with crazy intensity but you may have that feeling of distance, like he is just out of reach. That is where a little faith comes into play and we cement ourselves in for a battle and the lord comes through in the end.

FEELING GOD AT TIMES

*Before Mexico hard but do able
*During Mexico it was easy pizzi
*Right after mexico still easy
*2 years after a little bit difficult at time
*In Argentina it was a time a battle to feel like i was getting more than 20 minutes of good being next to God. (deffinately times where I just kinda let myselt rest without him instead of resting in him) after all i was on vacation too, i wanted to rest. The worlds yoke just appeared litter and the yoke I
was pulling for him. Sad excuse, everytime I shop around for the worlds rest I find it to be less than satisfying. Resting in my heavenly fathers arms is 10000% better than the worlds form or R&R.

Why did I have to battle so much to find and be close to God. Even though I feel like I was down there for the right reason and want to go down to get closer to him and not have any distraction of work or friends. It doesn't matter if I'm workng 40 hours a week farming or 40 hours on the mission field. Being close to Jesus is a battle in a busy world, and Argentina was plenty busy. Mexico is busy, just at a different speed. the US is busy, and hangs out with his friend Busier on the weekends. We need to slow down sometimes. and fight for some special God time. I wish I could say we can do it at full speed and it will be great but I'm thinking God time is spent best at God speed. Even if he still feels distant, persueing him will a furvent energy proves that you believe he will have a lasting impact on your life even if you can't feel like it's happening. God has a funny way of teaching, I don't think Job felt like he was learning much in his troubles, Or David when he was hiding in caves writing all those psalms. Some stuff will pop up on God time, not on our time. Cuz honestly i didn't feel like I learned anything big or life altering while I was in Argentina. There was some stuff that I forced out of me but nothing hugely impactful. That is why I did'nt write to many spiritual blogs. But now that I am home I'm am having that little mole hill of lessons turning into a Mount Everest of rock your socks of life changes.

So i will just keep the dialog going about argentina until god has finishing teaching me everything.

Scott